Rock star Rod Stewart will publish his first children’s book, Buckets of Fun, next week through Tiny Tattler Press, which continues their series of books written by celebrities who have been the victims of urban myth.
For years, rumors have surfaced that Stewart collapsed at an after concert party and was rushed to the emergency room, where doctors pumped anywhere from a pint to 10 gallons of semen out of this stomach. The story has also been attributed to Elton John, David Bowie, and Mick Jagger–typically rock & roll singers from that generation who were sometimes criticized for being less than manly–but Stewart seems to be the celebrity most often identified in the tale.
“I despise bad science,” Stewart said. “So when my daughter Kimberly came to me in tears and asked if the rumor was true, we put on matching white lab coats and went into the kitchen. I set her up on the counter and gave her a teaspoon and explained that the average man will ejaculate only enough semen to fill half of that spoon, which I demonstrated with salad dressing. Then I showed her how many teaspoons it would take to fill a pint-sized shot glass, then a 10-gallon bucket. It didn’t take long for my daughter to do the math.”
“It’s hard enough for even adults to remember how many pints are in a liter, let alone a child, so we feel this story is a perfect way to teach toddlers about liquid conversion, as well as thwart bad science,” said Kiki Cummings, Publisher of Tiny Tattler Press. “It also opens the door for parents to teach children at an early age that some people with funny haircuts do funny things in the bedroom–just not Rod Stewart. I mean, who knows what Britney Spears gets up to!”
The book comes with a sippy cup shaped like a bucket with the different liquid amounts marked on the sides, plus a caricature of Stewart telling children via a cartoon balloon, “Bottoms up!”
Next up, Tiny Tattler Press continues the series with the release of Jamie Lee Curtis’ I Can Use Both Restrooms later this fall.