Top Ten Useful Foreign Phrases to Avoid Awkward Situations While Abroad

When you visit another coun­try where Eng­lish is not the native lan­guage, it can be chal­leng­ing.  How­ever, every­one quickly learns the phrases to ask where to exchange cur­rency, be directed to the restroom, and where to find the U.S. embassy if one gets in trou­ble in a for­eign land.  Here’s a list of 10 help­ful for­eign lan­guage phrases that will come in handy while vaca­tion­ing abroad.

1. Should an ora­cle warn you of impend­ing doom before head­ing down to check out the nude beach in Mykonos, tell the hotel clerk, Εάν πεθάνω, παρακαλώ γλιστρήστε κάποιο καθαρό εσώρουχο στο γυμνό cor­pose μου προτού να καλέσετε τη μητέρα μου., which means, If I should die, please slip some clean under­wear on my naked corpse before you call my mother.

2. If you find your­self sud­denly need­ing fem­i­nine pro­tec­tion in down­town Tokyo, ask, 最も近いタンポンディスペンサーに私を指示するか, which trans­lates to mean: Would you please direct me to the near­est tam­pon dispenser?

3. If you find your­self sus­pect amongst the other peo­ple in the Bagh­dad, tell them, sim­ply state:  ، ولی من در واقع يك سطل زباله انتقال كانادا خنک…, which means:  I may appear to be an obnox­ious Amer­i­can, but I’m actu­ally an effort­lessly cool Canadian.

4. If a pimp attempts to barter with you while on hol­i­day in Moscow, say, То очень великодушное предложение, но моя дочь нет для сбывания, which means: That is a very gen­er­ous offer, but my daugh­ter is not for sale.

5. If you’re an organic food enthu­si­ast and find your­self being offered a local del­i­cacy in India, politely ask, बहाना मुझे ये मुक्त रेंज बंदर दिमाग?, which trans­lates to:  Excuse me, are these free-range mon­key brains?

6. After spend­ing two hours on a tour bus with a Ger­man fam­ily with unruly chil­dren, say to the par­ents, Ihre Kinder haben mich die Tiere nach­prüfen gelassen, die ihre Junge essen, which means: Your chil­dren have made me recon­sider ani­mals eat­ing their young.

7. If a French per­son comes up to you on the streets of Paris and play­fully asks if that’s a baguette in your pocket or if you’re just happy to see her, reply,En fait, c’est une baguette dans ma poche, bien qu’it’ ; s beau pour vous voir, aussi bien, which means:  Actu­ally, it is a baguette in my pocket, although it’s lovely to see you, as well.

8. After you arrive in Ams­ter­dam, if you dis­cover that you have for­got­ten your husband’s CPAT machine back home and he has dread­ful sleep apnea, say to the concierge, Hebt u iets dat ik mijn hus­band’ kon dem­pen; s snurkt met, nog hem niet eigen­lijk ver­stikken?, which means.  Do you have some­thing that I could muf­fle my husband’s snores with, yet not actu­ally suf­fo­cate him?

9. Should you hire a dri­ver who seems to be on a quest to take you to ever wot with a bald Bud­dhist nun in Thai­land, say to the dri­ver, ไม่ ต้องการ ทัวร์ ท่องเที่ยว วัด ใด เพิ่มเติม ใน วัน นี้ — - i am พระพุทธรูป ก็ จะ ออก มา !, which means:  I do not wish to tour any more tem­ples today–I am Buddha’d out!

10. If you acci­den­tally wan­der into a gay bar in Rio de Janeiro and some­one of the same sex asks you to dance, you may politely decline by say­ing Nen­hum obri­gado, I’ m ape­nas aqui para a música do disco, which means:  No thank you, I’m just here for the disco music.