The Atlanta Police Department (APD) arrested Jerry Eggers, a 28-year-old artist specializing in works made from hemp, for kidnapping Alvin Mortimer, 42, a little person, on his way home from working a gig at Enya’s Bordello, an edgy Irish pub in East Atlanta Village.
Mortimer reported that Eggers confronted him at the corner of Flat Shoals Avenue and Metropolitan and demanded to be taken to his pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Mortimer was still dressed as a leprechaun at the time, which ties into a weeklong St. Patrick’s Day promotion at Enya’s Bordello. “I don’t know what that idiot was on, but he was certainly high,” said Mortimer.
According to the APD report, Eggers mistakenly believed that the legendary pot of gold that leprechauns kept at the end of the rainbow is of the canabis variety. Eggers was quoted as saying, “Give me the little funny cigarettes made by the little funny people.”
When Mortimer explained that he was neither a leprechaun or possessed any marijuana, Eggers became agitated. He tied Mortimer to the back of his moped and drove to Grant Park, where he managed to haul Mortimer over the fence of Zoo Atlanta.
Eggers told Mortimer that he was going to lower him into the aligator pit unless he revealed the locatio of his pot of gold. By the time the APD arrived, they found Eggers repeatedly casting and reeling in mortimer with a fishing pole in the flamingos display, admist a cloud of pink feathers.
Police officers quickly apprehended Eggers and freed Mortimer, who required treatment for flamingo exposure. The ER staff at Grady Hospital pumped 16 oz. of flamingo feathers from Mortimer’s stomach. “It was like he ate part of a Vegas showgirl,” said Dr. William Chan.
Eggers is currently being held downtown to await sentencing. A blood test revealed an excessively high level of alcohol and canabis in his system, as well as an extreme amount of Mentos.
Mortimer, has quit his job at Enya’s Bordello and is now collaborating with Zoo Atlanta on a special high-diving act in the flamingo exhibit.