Millie McGee attended a My Body, My Stuff seminar at the suggestion of her therapist, so that she could get in touch with her sexuality and create greater intimacy within her marriage. But McGee froze up when it came to the exercise where the women stand over mirrors and sketch their reproductive organs. “I just couldn’t do it,” McGee said, trembling. “I just wasn’t ready to face myself.”
According to feminist entrepreneur Jo Doe, McGee isn’t alone. “Most women just can’t leap into the bed with just anyone; they need to be romanced and develop a friendship first,” Doe said. “Why should it be any different in establishing a relationship with our vaginas?”
Using the proceeds from her groundbreaking book on female empowerment through abstinence, Sit on It!, Doe has created Twatter, a microblogging tool that uses unique algorithms to create a dialog between women and their genitals—and it’s created quite a buzz.
“I love Twatter,” McGee gushes. “I love to know what my vagina is thinking, what she’s feeling, what she’s craving.” As if on cue, McGee’s smart phone vibrates in her pocket. She smiles as she peeks at the display, then reveals a message: “Hey, Lady, how ‘bout a chocolate break?”
Younger women have flocked to Twatter, but it’s really taken off with older women. “You know, I can just have the day from hell,” begins attorney Sarah Davis, “But then I receive a twat from my vagina that says, ‘Hey, Girl, let’s head to your place after work and unwind with some Michael Bolton,’ and it just makes everything so much better.”
When asked if Twatter is nothing more than sexting one’s own sex for ladies, Doe defends her microblogging miracle, as some women have referred to it. “Men are practically born with their penis in hand and they take their relationship with their manhood for granted Everytime they take a leak, they see it swinging their between their legs, which may be why men are so visual. Women, on the other hand, can’t even see their womanhood. They have to build a relationship slowly, over mutual trust and shared interest. That’s Twatter excels at!”
When asked if her relationship with womb is entirely platonic, McGee giggles and turns red. She shares a twat from last weekend when her vagina twatted the lyrics to the Beach Boys’ “Good Vibrations.”